Running Was Designed By Sadists

I spent yesterday evening dealing with all sorts of nasty consequences from my 1.4 miles. First I thought, oh great, I really am getting trichinosis (we ate partially uncooked pork Sunday night), then I decided I must be terribly allergic to wasp stings, and finally I realized it was the run that was making me feel like death. Nice. I was too sick even to enjoy reading. This afternoon I am going to huddle in bed and hold my stomach, or maybe get my head examined.

Bill, of course, helpfully informs me this is normal. When I am in better shape (meaning after I have subjected myself to several more months of this), I will not get nearly so sick. Something to look forward to.

I'm at church and I'm supposed to work now. I don't feel particularly up to it. I'm going to drink gallons of water and eat bunches of bananas and curse the inventors of fitness.

I'm Running A 5K!

Just ran 1.4 miles in 16 minutes in the afternoon sun. I think I may vomit, but I did it. I discovered that my pedometer is only accurate on mileage when one is walking, which means I've been running quite a bit rather than I think I have. For instance, I drove my current route in my car and it is 1.4, but after having just run it my pedometer says I have gone only a mile. So--me is not as slow as me thinks. Ha!

As soon as I send in my check I will be officially signed up for the 5K in Skowhegan on the 23rd. Becky, Justin, Mark, Wladimir, and possibly Felipe are running as well. I can't wait. A goal makes all this running actually possible. Otherwise I would be lying in bed right now, sleeping or reading. Instead I am a sweaty mess.

At least I haven't actually vomited.

Arthritis Cures And Adrenaline--Get Stung By Wasps

After running a little over two miles yesterday evening, I got home, reached up to pull the cord that turns on my overhead light, and grabbed a wasp. For two hours my hand was on fire. I tried ignoring it, splitting my mind off into a different zone. NOT successful. I tried ice. That worked for the first hour, then failed miserably. I thought perhaps amputating my hand would solve the problem, but couldn't find a knife large enough. Eventually I did fall asleep, and this morning my palm is only slightly swollen and I can type without feeling like thousands of tiny needles are being driven through my flesh.

Bill, of course, was full of wasp related information. No, wasps do not die after stinging you. They live to sting another day. They can also bite you while stinging you. I should feel a surge of adrenaline for the next couple days and any arthritis I have will feel better (apparently people get stung by wasps on purpose for this very reason).

Bill also helpfully informed me that running 2.3 miles in 36 minutes is horribly slow. Most days I wouldn't care, but today he depressed me. I'd be much more inspired if he patted me on the back and said, "Good job--keep this up and you'll be faster in no time!"

But Bill is Bill, and he is used to motivating boys.

I'm going to focus on the positive, which is that only a week ago I was running 1.1 miles in 30 minutes. In a single week I doubled my distance. This afternoon I hope to do fast one mile circuits (to Acadia clinic and back), with rest between. With luck, I can at least wear out Osito.

And just think--the wasp sting will give me that burst of adrenaline I've been waiting for!

Great Marathon Runner, Me

Just ran 1.8 miles (almost 3K). I don't think I have ever been this drenched in sweat before. I'm dripping as much as I was when I walked home in the pouring rain four hours ago. Running is a funny thing, because I start out feeling exhausted and the first half mile is like pulling teeth and I just want to go home and collapse, but the further I go the more energy I get. I'm not sure I understand that concept, but it's kind of cool. Osito wore out after a little over a mile, so I dropped him off at the house and ran the rest of it alone.

I have exactly 30 days to work up to running 5K for that race. Me can do this!

I biked 12 miles with Becky yesterday, using Justin's racing bike. I was worried I wouldn't be able to do it because I haven't biked in over a year and last time I tried it I was exhausted after about 15 minutes, but yesterday my legs never even burned. Becky kept saying there was a hill coming up and she wasn't looking forward to it and we'd go along for 5 or 10 minutes and I'd say, "So when is this hill coming?" and she'd say, "That was it." I am in love with racing tires.

Of course, with racing tires as soon as you turn off the pavement onto a gravel driveway you fall flat on your face, but you're better off not dwelling on that part too much.

So Far So Good

Went running with the McKennas this evening. Becky and I did 1.8 miles (including brief periods of walking), and Justin did 3 miles in the same amount of time. Of course. It felt really good and when I got home I took Osito for a fast run around three blocks to wear him out. There's a 5K marathon on August 23rd that a bunch of the guys from church are entering and I think it would be so cool to be able to do that too. 5K is only 3.1 miles. I'm pretty sure I could train fast enough to be able to run 3 miles steady in a month's time. Running seems to be one of those things that gets easier the more you do it. I am all wet and disgusting but physically I feel great.